August 22, 2006

Wherein our hostess momentarily loses her senses

I have the urge to awaken my inner Samuel L Jackson and spout out “punk ass bitch”. I practiced on the way into work. You gotta kinda spit out the P and the B. Remember, however, that a little spittle goes a long way. Punk ass bitch. Very satisfying. It’s really versatile, you can say kinda quiet, slow and deliberate with only your mouth or you can take it up a few notches, bringing your eyes into the whole sinister snarl of punk ass bitch where the words are pushed out but still in a hushed threatening way. Or go all ca-RAZY and wild-eyed and maybe just a little twitchy too. PUNK ASS.... BITCH!!!!!

I don’t, for the life of me, know why this phrase is so tempting to spout out. It makes me sound like a very angry little person. Who you callin’ a punk ass bitch, bitch? It’s like I’m a little possessed by a mad black lady. Well, not actually a lady if I’m using this kind of inappropriate language. Oooh! Maybe I’m possessed by Pam Grier! That would be awesome. I’d like some of those kick-ass boots, please. It totally loses it’s cajones when you giggle. Okay okay. I’m mean. Yup. Mean as a snake. Errrrrrr. Punk ass. Bitch!

Wha? Hunh? Oh. Did I say that outloud? Sorry. Huhn? Well, yeah, I got work I should do... Oh. Okay. Um.

(later you punk ass bitches!)

UPDATED to add the kick ass picture at right! thanks Monica! Amazing how you JUST happen to have a pam grier image handy!

 

Posted by Pagalina at 10:02:59 | Permanent Link | Comments (5) |
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1 - damn! can i post that? :)
 (Comment this)

Written by: pagalina at 2006/08/22 - 13:47:42
2 - You have to post that picture. It rocks. Nice job Monica. (Comment this)

Written by: Anonymous at 2006/08/22 - 14:24:30
3 - I personally like Samuel L. Jackson's usage of the words "motherf***er/motherf***ing." It's tough and it's funny (even though it's also completely crude). I think I sound badass when I say it when I'm peeved, but my hubby isn't convinced, since I'm not a 6'2" black man, but rather a 5'3" Chinese woman. ;) (Comment this)

Written by: mrsloquacious at 2006/08/22 - 20:38:14
4 - I'm slow (you already did), but OF COURSE you can post that! :)

As to having a photo of Pam Grier around, well all I have to say is "god bless Google Images." It was actually harder finding a pic of you, sweetie! (it's from the "Butch loves the Ladies" series)

...oh! and thanks for the link love! :) (Comment this)

Written by: monica at 2006/08/23 - 15:40:29
5 - Pam Grier is a goddess. I love that woman. I think she is one of the few people that my boyfriend can stare at open-mouthed and I don't even blink. I am the possessor of a HUGE potty mouth and I love to find out new ways to exercise that talent. I don't have anything I am particularly fond of currently but I hope to discover a new one soon. (Comment this)

Written by: Natalie at 2006/08/28 - 14:42:30
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